15 Promises for Finn

This year, I will get to celebrate my Mother's Day that has been a long time coming. Last year, I bought myself a Mother's Day gift that was a necklace to honor our babies who are now with Jesus. This year, I plan on spending the weekend with my boys. In honor of my first Mother's Day, I wanted to write this post to Finn- who has now given me something to celebrate on this day by making me a mommy.  I feel like I've seen a lot of these lists recently on Facebook, pinterest, etc. They always get me thinking, so I wanted to compile my own list. I definitely cannot take credit for every single thing on this list- like I said I've read so many of these that a few are borrowed but all are true.

15 promises for Finn:

1. I promise to love you unconditionally. Yes, this means right now while you are a snuggly little baby who smiles and laughs and thinks I'm the best thing in the whole wide world. But is also means when you are moody teenager and want me out of your room- I will love you the same.

2. I promise to show you how much I love you- often. This means lots of kisses and snuggles now. But is also means lunchbox notes and Chick-fil-A dates when you're older and lots of hugs when you're even older.

3. I promise to dance with you. We already do this now while your feet are quite a distance from the floor. When you're a little bigger, I will turn on the music and let you go crazy. I promise to teach you to dance for your first high school dance and be there to dance with you at your wedding.

4. I promise to play make-believe.  I will help you beat the bad guys with your action figures, swim away from the pirates in the pool and allow you  to shoot me with your spidey web.

5. I promise to give you freedom to explore. Sweet boy, there are a lot of bad things in this world- but there are also a lot of good. I promise to let you run around, climb trees, stay up late sometimes and count the stars.

6. I promise to comfort you. Right now when you cry out at night, when you fall off your bike and scrape your knee, when you don't make the team and the first time a girl breaks your heart.

7. I promise to teach you what real beauty is. Most people only think about this in relation to girls. I will let you watch me put my make-up on and do my hair. I want you to see what I do to feel beautiful but also know that just being your mom makes me feel beautiful and that real beauty is on the inside.

8. I promise to teach you respect. It is important that you respect not only your mom- but all women.

9. I promise to teach you responsibility. You will take out the trash, unload the groceries and put away your clothes. I promise to teach you what it takes to run a house so that you will appreciate all your future wife does one day.

10. I promise to be your biggest fan. I will be on the sideline of every game and in the front row of every performance.

11. I promise to show you how much I love daddy. With cards, special dinners and kisses, I promise to set the bar high for your standard of a Christian wife.

12. I promise to let you learn the hard way. This one will definitely be the hardest for me. As much as I would love to make your life easy and free from pain, I promise to let you make mistakes and learn the consequences.

13. I promise to teach you how to iron a shirt, make a bed and cook a meal. For this alone, I know your future wife will thank me.

14. I promise to teach you to be a gentleman. Your daddy is the best example of this, but I promise to let you open the door for me without trying to help.

15. I promise that I will always be your mom.  I realize that I only get a short time with you under our roof as your mommy that plays with you and packs your lunches, but long after you're gone and even when you have your own family- I will still be your mom.

I am so thankful that God chose me to be your mommy.

Six Month Photos

Well friends, the fabulous Christine LeGrand has done it again. She took pictures of our little family when Finn was one month old (which I'm just now realizing I never posted) and they were so fantastic, we asked her to take six month photos although he was really 7 months as well. She does amazing work and is super sweet to work with on top of it. I would highly recommend her if you're getting married, having a baby or just want to better document your life. Her website is http://christinelegrandphoto.com/.

Birthiversary Staycation

If you know us or have been a blog follower for a while, you know that the husband's birthday is the same day as our anniversary- May 12. Over the past 7 years (yes 7!) we have lovingly referred to this day as our birthiversary. This past Thursday night, my sweet mother-in-love came to town so that we could get away for a little staycation. We stayed at the Intercontinental in Buckhead that was only 15 min from our house, but it definitely felt like we were on our own little getaway. It has been a while since I did a post that was just about the two of us and I forgot my real camera, so these are just from my phone.

Thurs night, we walked down the street to Maggianos and used a giftcard for dinner.

I seriously cannot say enough good things about the Intercontinental. We used credit card points and got a corner room on the 19th floor with access to the Intercontinental club lounge that included free snacks, dessert, breakfast and drinks. Fri morning, I got a massage and facial in their spa and it was so wonderful to be pampered!

 

 After the spa, we walked to brunch at Highland Bakery.

 After brunch, we spent a few hours by the pool and had it mostly to ourselves seeing as most people were there for business. It was D.E.L.I.G.H.T.F.U.L.

 

After we checked out at 2pm, we headed to catch a movie before heading home to our little man.  So thankful for this short getaway!

 And... just for fun, here is quite possibly the cutest video you'll ever see.

Adopted is a past tense word

This post has been on my mind for some time now, but I am only now getting a chance to sit down and write my thoughts out. This time last year, when we started the adoption process, Dustin and I each read the book Adopted for Life by Russell Moore. While this post isn't meant to be a book review, I would definitely recommend it to anyone considering or just wanting to know more about adoption. There are some parts of it that I don't completely agree with (e.g his views on IVF and any medically invasive fertility treatments) but I think that overall it was very beneficial for us. One of his chapters is titled "Adopted is a Past Tense Word".

This is a statement I agree with 110%.

Have you ever noticed when people talk about families with children that have been adopted, they are always referred to as "well Suzy just has the sweetest adopted daughter", "Suzy, mother to 3 adopted children" or even worse "Suzy has 2 kids of her own and 3 adopted children". Now this example isn't to pick on Suzy. I don't even know Suzy. It's just to make a point. Why must people feel the need to differentiate adopted children from biological children as if they are lesser than or somehow not a complete part of the family? Whether your child(ren) was(were) adopted at birth or as a teenager- they become wholly part of your family.

Another part of the book that was meant in a half-joking/half-serious manner that really stuck with me was when he talked about his children- two boys who were adopted as infants from Russia and two biological boys. He stated that he doesn't see the need in telling others (especially strangers) how each of his children joined his family. For example, here is Will, our natural delivery child, Scott, our cesarean child and Mike and Tim, our adopted children. Those aren't their real names, but the point is-- it doesn't matter how your son or daughter joined your family. When they joined your family- they are your family. Finn doesn't look at me as his adopted mom. I am his mom. I feed him and clothe him and play with him and comfort him when he's sad. He rests his head on my shoulder at night and smiles the biggest smile when I see him when he wakes up in the morning. It would not be any different if we adopted him at birth or at 15. There may be some more psychological issues to overcome if you adopt an older child who has memories from a previous family-- but that doesn't change the fact that he or she is your son or daughter.

We should be ever so thankful that our Heavenly Father doesn't view our spiritual adoption as His children the way that some people view physical adoption here on earth. He doesn't look at us as adopted children. According to Romans 8:17, we are co-heirs with Christ and you can't be more a part of God's family than that. "And since we are his children, we are his heirs. In fact, together with Christ we are heirs of God's glory. But if we are to share his glory, we must also share his suffering." 

 So yes. Adopted is a past tense word. It may be how your child joined your family, but it is not your child's permanent place in your family. As a helpful tip, when referring to a family that has both biological children and adopted children- never use the phrase "kids of your own and adopted kids". The term biological children is perfectly acceptable to use in this circumstance- if you even have the need to differentiate. I can tell you that Finn is 100% our own. And if God decided to bless us with biological children one day, Finn will remain our own. Though he doesn't share our DNA, he has had our hearts from day 1. He views us as the only mom and dad he's ever known and we are his whole world (right now anyway). Why would we ever want to view him as anything less than that? 

*drops the mic* Now someone hold my hand as I step down off my soapbox.

JLF Golf Tournament

Yesterday, we spent the day in Clemson as Dustin played in the JLF golf tournament with all of his college friends. This is such a fun annual event and this year was Finn's first tournament. The JLF golf tournament is hosted each year by some close friends of ours to celebrate the beautiful life of our friend, Walt's older sister. Since we've graduated, it's become a fun reunion to see college friends that are now spread across the southeast. We had the most beautiful weather and I'm so glad that Finn got to meet so many new friends for the first time.

As good as we could get with all the babies. If you look closely, you can see Finn comforting his buddy Ford on the left.

 The guys and their kiddos.

Wishing daddy good luck.

 Twinsies.

 My heart.

 A couple rare pics of me and my boy since I'm usually the one behind the camera.

 One of the best things about spring. Baby. Legs.

 Finn and Piper become fast friends.

 Family pic.