11-11-11

"America will never run... And we will always be grateful that liberty has found such brave defenders." -George W. Bush

Grief

I usually like to write about life happenings and the ups and downs that go with them. Well recently, things have been a bit on the down side. We found out on Saturday that a dear friend from high school and Dustin's childhood passed away suddenly. Not only were Dustin and Jake good friends growing up, but Jake's mom was my cheerleading coach throughout high school, so we were both close to this sweet family. Please keep the Kneece family in your thoughts and prayers.

Dustin was able to make it back to Aiken for his viewing and funeral, but he made the trip solo because I had to stay in Atlanta for work. When he got home, he was recapping the events to me and one of the things he noticed was that there are many people who don't know what to say or do around people who are grieving. I'm sure a lot of that comes from the fact that there is really nothing you can say or do to make their pain go away, but there are things you can do to make it easier. I am around grieving parents who have lost their children everyday, but I am by no means a psychiatrist or an expert on grief. These are simply some things that both Dustin and I picked up on when we went through our own storm this summer. These are definitely not directed at any particular person, because we've had great support from friends and family, but rather these are some helpful guidelines to follow when there is someone in your life going through a hard time or dealing with the loss of a loved one.

1. Don't say "I'm sorry". Unless you are a direct cause of their pain, there is no need to apologize. They already know you are sorry for their loss, but what they need to hear is how their loved one's life- no matter how short- made a difference to you. 

2. Don't bombard them with Scripture in person. Even though it is Truth, they don't need you to stand there and recite seven verses to them. Chances are, they are numb to hearing most of the same verses over and over. Scripture will still speak truth to their hearts, but a better way to do this is to include one or two verses in a handwritten note or even an email. It would also be a good idea to include the names of a few songs they can listen to on their own time.

3. Don't ask them how they are doing over "small talk" in a very public setting. Chances are, they don't want to cry their eyes out in the pasta aisle of the grocery store or while shaking hands at church. If you really want to know how they are doing, ask them if they want to grab some coffee, go for a walk, etc. If they are feeling up to it, you can also ask them when you bring a meal by their house... which brings me to my next point.

4. Don't say "Let me know if you need anything". Nine times out of ten, they are not going to ask anyone to do anything for them. Instead, tell them what you would like to do for them and let them decide on the timing "Can I drop a meal by tonight for dinner?" "Can I come by on Saturday and mow your lawn?" "I'm at Publix right now, can I pick up a few things and bring them to you?" Also, when you bring them a meal, put it in a disposable container with instructions. The last thing you want them to worry about is how long to cook a lasagna or washing and returning dishes.

5. Don't overshadow their situation with your own personal experience. It doesn't matter if you have gone through the same exact situation; their's is different because it is happening to them. They will get more encouragement out of it if you say things like "I know right now, you're feeling like God has turned away from you. I just want you to know that He is very near even when you can't feel it and I'm praying everyday that you will feel His presence and know that He still loves you."

6. When you say you're going to pray for them- really pray for them. Even better, offer to pray with them or over them either in person or over the phone.

7. Lastly, don't assume they only need encouragement for the first couple weeks. Send them an email or drop a handwritten card in the mail after a couple months to let them know you are still thinking about and praying for them.

Even though there really is no perfect way to encourage someone who is hurting, you can still make a difference as long as you don't blend in with the crowd of hugs and I'm sorries. People just want to know that you genuinely care for them and hurt when they hurt. When they are unable to see the big picture and God's ultimate plan, you can be a glimpse of His love until they do.

Watch and Earn

The Verizon Foundation is donating $1 for each view this video gets up to $25,000. I would LOVE if each of you would click on the below link to watch the video just one time... or 500, it's up to you.  It will only take two minutes of your time and it will give you the warm fuzzies. Feel free to pass my blog onto your friends and family and encourage them to watch it too!

Easiest Ever Pumpkin Muffins

So when the trees look like this outside, I suddenly have the urge to bake all things pumpkin.

This has to be the easiest, yummiest pumpkin muffin recipe I've ever made. Are you ready for this?

Easiest Ever Pumpkin Muffins
1 box of spice cake mix
1 can of pumpkin puree (not pie filling)

Directions
1. Mix together the dry cake mix and the canned pumpkin using an electric mixer.

2. Spoon batter into greased muffin pan or paper muffin cups. It will be a bit stickier than a normal batter, but you do not need to add anything to it- I promise!

3. Bake at 350 for approximately 20 minutes. This recipe makes about 15 muffins. I rolled mine in powdered sugar to make them pretty.

Enjoy!!

The one with all of the Halloweens

Halloween is a pretty big deal for most kids. When kids are in the hospital, it's my job to make sure it's a huge deal. The entire month of October is really devoted to all things Halloween. Between the parties, movies, costume shop, Halloween Bingo and more... whew, I am one pumpkin short of a very large patch. October went out with a bang yesterday as we had our Halloween Carnival and petting zoo. The kids wear their costumes and trick-or-treat around the hospital as well. One mom told me yesterday that her son was sad about being in the hospital for Halloween, but that this was actually one of the best Halloweens they've ever had... collective *awww*. Here are some highlights of the day.

 

Gotta love an office where you can do this. 

 

Our petting zoo in the garden.

 

 

Today starts the Christmas season for me at work, so ho ho ho... fa la la la la... and all of that merry stuff. Seriously, though... bring on the reindeer games!

Creamy Garlic Basil Pasta

I'm pretty sure that Dustin wouldn't like the name of this post, because he has a disdain for certain words... "creamy" being one of them. Well, whatever you want to call this dish is up to you- just as long as you make it. If I could live on one food for the rest of my life, it would probably be pasta. Most of my recipes are a bit summer-ish because they are light and involve fresh veggies and  EVOO. But seeing as we are waist-deep into my favorite season right now, I wanted to make a more substantial pasta dish. I made it with shrimp, but you could easily make this with chicken.

Creamy Garlic Basil Pasta
1 pound of pasta (I used fettuccine, but may try with penne next time per the husband's suggestion)
1/2 pound of shrimp (peeled, deveined, but they don't have to be cooked)
3 cups of sliced mushrooms (this is an estimate- I used an entire container from the produce section)
5 cloves of garlic (chopped)
10 oz container of Philadelphia Cooking Creme (I used savory garlic... what can I say, I have a thing for garlic)
4 tbsp butter
4 small tomatoes (chopped- I used Campari, but plum would work too)
Handful of fresh basil (chopped)

Directions
1. Bring a large pot of water to a boil and add the pasta once it is boiling.

2. In a large saute pan, drizzle some EVOO and heat to medium. Add garlic and cook until fragrant.

3. Add the shrimp and cook through.

4.  Add the mushrooms and let cook for about 3 minutes.

5. Mix in the Philadelphia Cooking Creme and butter to the shrimp/mushroom mixture.

6. Add a ladle of water from the boiling pasta to the shrimp/mushroom mixture to dilute the sauce a bit.

7. Drain the pasta and add to the shrimp and mushrooms. Turn the heat down to low and coat the pasta in the sauce.

8. Top with the chopped basil and tomatoes, cover and let simmer for about 5-7 minutes to wilt the basil.

This make a ton, so it's great to serve if you're cooking for 5-6 people. Serve topped with grated parmesan. Enjoy!!

Slow Cooker White Chicken Chili

If I could write an entire cookbook on slow cooker soups, this one would definitely be included. It was very easy and quite healthy. Enjoy!

Slow Cooker White Chicken Chili
3 boneless, skinless chicken breasts (thawed or frozen... doesn't matter)
2 cans of great northern beans (drained)
1 can of yellow corn (drained)
1 can of green chiles (4 oz.)
1 yellow onion (chopped)
1 carton of chicken broth
1 lime (juiced)
Handful of fresh chopped cilantro

Directions
1. Place chicken on the bottom of the slow cooker.

2. Pour everything else on top of it.

3. Cook on low for 6 hours (if using thawed chicken) or 8 hours (if using frozen chicken).

4. Shred the chicken with two forks and stir through.

After I shredded the chicken, I added a few shakes of salt, poultry seasoning and cayenne pepper for some kick and then stirred that through. Top it with sour cream, shredded cheese and sliced avocado- DELISH!